Best Funny Facebook Status!

1. You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot today.
2. Losing a husband can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.
3. Bigamy: One wife too many. Monogamy: Same thing.
4. I am finally old enough to realize my father was right, but now my kids think I am wrong.
5. World Population Rank: 1.China 2.India 3.Facebook 4.USA 5.MySpace 6.Indonesia 7.Brazil 8.Twitter
6. If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.
7. An apple a day keeps the doctor away but if the doctor is beautiful throw the apple away!
8. This dog is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.
9. Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
10. Some men inherit money, some earn it, and some are lawyers.
11. Why don't you understand me like my iPhone does??
12. If I were any more single, I'd be a fraction. :)
13. These are just a few funny Facebook status quotes. You may even find the following funny Facebook status quotes and jokes a bit hilarious too.
14. Funny Facebook Status Quotes and Jokes
15. I am in a relationship with studies and it's complicated :">
16. When I'm bored, nobody texts me, but when I'm busy, my phone blows up.
17. Is that your ex? No, that's the biggest mistake of my life.
18. If Google can't find it, you are screwed.
19. I stepped on a cornflake. Does that mean I'm a cereal killer?
20. Yo Mamas So Fat She Downloaded Cheats For Wii Fat!
21. All work and no play, will make you a manager.
22. Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.
23. Computers: Working daily to make the human brain obsolete.
24. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
25. I once cried when I had no Facebook....Then i met someone with no Internet!
26. If "poli" means many, and "tics" mean bloodsucking creatures, then what does "politics" mean?‌
27. I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.
28. You don't know a women till you've met her in court.
29. I woke up on the wrong side of Facebook.
30. My Facebook wall is broken.
31. Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but duck when you throw a revolver at him?"